While I'm in this vein, if there's one thing that makes me really, really angry, it's the people (usually in the elderly care services) who say to me, "Now, you've got to look after yourself - what will happen to your mother if something happens to you?"
The first time someone said that to me, my jaw dropped. PARDON?? No-one ever dared underestimate me like that in all my time with the government. Have these people no brain? Or have they no tact? Let's be honest - a comment as dumb and mindless as that is about all that's needed to totally destroy a caregiver whose life is being slowly consumed by the demands of a dementia patient. I want to say to these people (and have on occasion), "I don't care what happens to my mother if something happens to me - I CARE ABOUT ME if something happens to me - for crying out loud!"
If you are a caregiver, everything conspires to deny your true identity. Set a high priority on your own worth and integrity and don't let anyone steal it, ever - and that includes your patient. About which, more later.
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