Saturday, January 31, 2009

The Valley Narrows

I have now come to realise that though we may call ourselves Christian because of our general belief system, until we actually commit our lives to Christ, hand over the reins and ask Him to lead us, we belong to the world of His adversary. Many people do not realise that, and nor did I.

I managed to take my mom to attend a couple of services at church, but she didn't really enjoy them, or fully understand what was going on. The music upset her, which was a bit of a drama, but at least I tried. I realised very clearly that she no longer had the understanding for the sinner's prayer and the step I'd just taken. I was very sad about that.

The only thing I could comfort myself with was that throughout the middle stages of her illness we had frequently recited the Lord's Prayer, and it was she who always began it, though increasingly I had to finish it off. Earlier than that even, when we managed our flock of dairy goats, our favorite saying had been the old hymn, "Shepherd show me how to go o'er the hillside steep. How to gather, how to sow, how to feed Thy sheep ..."

Yes, Kath brought me up to it, and in the latter years of her dementia, she also cried out to God a lot in her everyday speech.

The first weekend in November, when she was in care again, the church had a healing service, and afterwards I went forward and asked for prayer for my mom. The Pastor took my face in her hands and said "Your mom's time is very close, but the Lord sees what you have been doing and He is well pleased with you." She went on to pray for us both.

This revelation hit me hard. It is strange how we know an outcome is inevitable, and yet when we are told it is close, the truth comes as a shock. I can remember afterwards while eveyone was chatting and having a cup of tea, I sat on a bench close to the door and looked out at the trees and the sunshine, trying to come to grips with it.

"Very close." How soon is very close? Weeks? Months? ... Days?

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Friday, January 30, 2009

A Blessed Respite

Early in October 2006, when my mom was in Respite Care for the week, a friend asked me if I would like to go to church with her and her husband.

All my life, except for my young years in Sunday School, I have never been a church-goer. My family and I would definitely have classed ourselves as Christians, and I know that after my dad was diagnosed with leukaemia he read the Bible quite a lot, but we hadn't attended church for years. I actually had a 'thing' about churches because I looked on 'religion' and churches as man-made things - which they are. My views on that have not changed.

Anyway, I agreed to go. I knew my friends attended a small interdenominational fellowship about half an hour's drive north from here on a beautiful stretch of our Far North coast.


This small church has a wonderful Worship Team. Well, the music and the presence of God's love that filled the school hall that day brought me to tears. Not only that, they were having a baptising day and so in a couple of hours, along with 3 others, I entered the chilly October waters of the South Pacific and was baptised into the Lord's family.

Without a doubt, that was THE greatest day of my life. Kind members of this tiny congregation - who had never heard of me before - were inspired to bring scriptures for me after it was over, and - amazingly enough - several of them were identical. It was a promise that I now see coming to pass:

"I will restore to you the years that the locusts have eaten." Joel 2:25

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