Here's another family photo spanning three generations that I've just come across and really like:
Left to right: My nana (Ken's mother), a lady I can't remember, Ken's sister Ena, me and Kath. I just don't know exactly where it was taken, but I know it was somewhere near Aberdeen, when the family came up to visit us and we went to see Balmoral. I like the way Kath's got her hand on my shoulder.- - - Technorati Tags:
alzheimers, alzheimers care, dementia, caregiver, alzheimers disease, death, dying, die, christian, gangrene
Here is another frozen moment - my mom (on the right) and my dad's twin sister Ena, sitting together on a wall, somewhere - probably before my mom and dad got married. Her pose is almost identical to another striking pic I have of her sitting on a wall in London, which I have misplaced (I hope temporarily).
It's great getting these photos out and looking at them again - it's almost as if time doesn't exist - and it's a great way to bridge those years that in many ways I'd rather forget.My dear neighbour's wife is suffering from dementia and sometimes when I see her she reminds me of Kath - and like Kath she has her bad days and her good days. I think it's much harder for a man to cope with this stuff than for a woman, so I visit often and let him get it off his chest to me.I went in a couple of hours ago after doing some shopping, and he is coming over tomorrow to help me change the belt on my waterpump. I think a bit of time away does him good, and I am and have always been eternally grateful for the help he has given me over the years.- - - Technorati Tags:
alzheimers, alzheimers care, dementia, caregiver, alzheimers disease, death, dying, die, christian, gangrene
This was taken one winter in the late 70's when I was home for a week's holiday, that turned out to be longer than expected. I came down with pneumonia and spent a couple of weeks in hospital. At the same time, Kath had bronchitis and we were both "recovering" - well wrapped up and feeling a bit groggy.- - - Technorati Tags:
alzheimers, alzheimers care, dementia, caregiver, alzheimers disease, death, dying, die, christian, gangrene
On the Sunday morning after Kath's death I went to sit with her coffin, as she and I had done with my father's in 1985, before it was taken away for cremation. I made up some flowers from our garden and our neighbour's, and I took along a number of photos of her in her prime.
Several people said they might come, but in the event no-one made it, so it was just me and the funeral director - and the music from "Simply Worship II". It was better that way because it helped me to retain my composure.
Her coffin was closed, and the man asked me if I would like it opened but I said "no". I'd said my farewell to her body in early hours of the morning before and now all I wanted to do was try and remember her as she used to be. The array of photos on the coffin was a start towards getting my mind back to my real mother. Ten years is a long time.
This was my farewell:
"Dear Kath,
I have come today to say farewell and pay my respects to your earthly body before it is returned to the cycle of creation. You don't need this body anymore because you now have a beautiful spiritual body, without pain or blemish, and you are flying with the angels and souls in God's kingdom. May the joy and peace of God which passeth all understanding, surround you for eternity, and may you live in the house of the Lord forever."
Patricia
The following Friday we had an afternoon tea for Kath at the hospital. It was a wonderful exchange of support and reminiscences. I took the photos along because I knew most of the staff had only ever seen her as a fragile little lady whose mind was gone. I told them about her past - her skill with figures and accounts, the positions she'd held in different companies and the help she had been to both my dad and me with house building and managing the land and the stock.
They were amazed, at the photos especially. In return I got some valuable reminiscences about her. The bulding manager recalled my father being admitted there in one of the crises of his illness. He remembered driving my dad's Fiat X19 with my mom as a passenger (she couldn't drive) down to the village to do some errands. He made the point how very friendly and lady-like she was. I loved that. She came from a good family and she knew how to behave and how to treat people right. I hope some of that rubbed off on me - it's been a dying quality in the world lately.
- - -
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All of us who have handled Alzheimers in our parents are very much aware of the possibility of inheriting it. I have said many times over recent years that I've dealt with this disease once in my life, and I do NOT want to be called upon to deal with it again - in the 1st person. For that reason, I'm trying to implement for myself as much as possible the Reverse Gangrene dietary recommendations. When you look at the diet our original hunter-gatherer ancestors must have lived on, there's no doubt that we have come a very long way from it in a relatively short time - and it's all downhill. It probably wouldn't hurt any of us to return to that style of diet as much as possible. It's also likely to cost us less - especially if we are able to grow our own veggies.It's not an "easy" diet - it doesn't pander to our depraved appetites (especially when it comes to sugar). BUT - no pain, no gain. By way of confirmation, the Reverse Gangrene principles are very similar to the diet recommended by another highly respected online health expert - Dr Joseph Mercola MD.
And for good measure, you will find some vey interesting reading along the same lines in a brilliant website authored by John B. Symes, D.V.M., a veterinarian with over 28 years of clinical experience who has some important insights into why our health and the health of our pets has deteriorated in the last few decades.While you are on Dr Mercola's site, type "green china tea" into his search box and you will find that's another thing that's said to be good for Alzheimers Disease. You'll recall I did feed it to my mom, but I think in her case it was too little, too late ...
Finally, I'd like to make one personal observation. Contrary to what one might expect, I've actually found I feel far LESS hungry once I drop all the grains out of my diet than I do when eating wheat or even rice. I substitute sunflower seeds and sesame seeds - both of which are very good for you, and once I've cleared the grains from my system, I find my digestion feels much more at peace and I'm not hankering for food all the time.- - - Technorati Tags:
alzheimers, alzheimers care, dementia, caregiver, alzheimers disease, death, dying, die, christian, gangrene
As you may know if you've read much of this blog, or been to my Health News website, I have a strong interest in alternative health. This was born out of my own lifetime struggle with what after 20 years was finally diagnosed as chronic systemic candida, contracted on board ship in the course of a double epidemic of dysentery and asian flu. A legacy of antibiotics.When I discovered the Reverse Gangrene site, I felt I had found another part to the huge puzzle that is the story of human health. It seemed to me that a product with the capacity to improve circulation to the extent of reversing necrosis in the extremities of the feet just MIGHT also hold a key to helping those with Alzheimers disease. I certainly felt that improving blood circulation and the level of nutrition throughout the body had possibilites for improving brain function.I was also fascinated by the dietary recommendations on this website, written to help people give their recovery the best chance possible. When one thinks of compromised circulation, what naturally comes to mind as the main culprit is dietary fats. I was initially amazed to find that in the dietary recommendations for combating gangrene, SUGAR was at the top of the list of no-nos - not just sugar in the sense of pure white and deadly, but all types of sugar, plus carbohydrates. Then I had a lightbulb moment regarding diabetes and the circulatory problems that diabetics are prone to. I recalled working during my university holidays at one of the rest-homes for the NZ Foundation for the Blind (Kath was responsible for this large organisation's payroll at the time), and I remembered how many of our ladies there had diabetes and how the diabetics had to have their feet watched constantly for gangrene. Sugar in the blood ...I would very much have liked to try out the Reverse Gangrene product on Kath - not only of course in the hope of reversing her gangrene, but also to see if it would have helped her brain function. But it was not to be, and ALL I CAN DO NOW is pass on this information to others who might be able to make use of it. Again, the website is HERE - and I have absolutely nothing to gain by referring you to it.- - - Technorati Tags:
alzheimers, alzheimers care, dementia, caregiver, alzheimers disease, death, dying, die, christian, gangrene
I came back home in the middle of the afternoon to feed my stock. The hospital rang in the early evening to ask if I'd go over to Kerikeri 20 miles away the following morning to pick up a prescription for one of the drugs they were running short of. I'd have to go back to the hospital first thing to pick up the script, so I decided not to go there that night. Kath was still unconscious, and we agreed they would ring me if there was any change.I spent the late evening on the net, and had just closed my computer down at midnight when the phone rang. It was the nurse on duty. "Your mom has just passed away," she said. "She passed away on the stroke of midnight. I heard her cry out and I went in there. Gradually her breathing slowed down and finally it stopped. I looked at the clock and it was exactly midnight." She was amazed at the precision of timing, and repeated it to me several times.The nurse said they were going to ring the funeral director to come in the morning and they would get her body prepared.
I knew Kath needed some better clothes - she had been in a hospital nightie earlier that day - so I said, "I'll be there shortly with a change of clothes for her."
I found a lovely pink nightie with frills that I didn't know we had and a nice pair of panties, loaded my dogs into the vehicle and set off down my long drive through the trees.
I rarely drive at night, purely because I have to drive alone, but I felt completely protected as I locked my gates and drove out onto the state highway to do what I had to do.The night was quiet and so peaceful, just as the morning had been after my father's death over 20 years before. I don't think I saw another vehicle on the road, going or coming back, which was unusual, and I felt strongly the presence of power and protection all around me.Kath looked the same as she had done earlier in the day, but now the struggle was over. I stroked her cheek, gave her all my love and blessings, and left her in the nurses' care, and - I hoped - God's.- - - Technorati Tags:
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